12 reasons why not to get an iPhone
So I have this list, mostly to convince myself. The reasons for are legion; the reasons against I need to remind myself of. I’ll share them, just in case they’re useful for you, too.
- My current phone is OK – actually, it’s quite good and small, and as a phone is excellent.
- I have a perfectly cool iPod Touch – it does everything that the iPhone does (well, except for the phone bit… oh, and the GPS stuff… and the pervasive net connection… STOP!).
- I’ve just re-signed to Vodafone on my existing plan – so I’d have to break the plan, causing a penalty, to take up any potential special iPhone plan.
- It’s expensive – New Zealand always gets reamed on the relative prices of gadgets, regardless of prices overseas.
- The iPhone camera is crap – 2 megapixel? PAH! I have my eye on a phone with 5 megapixels.
- They’re going to be so popular soon that it’ll be more of a statement NOT to have one – so I can be a rebel without spending a cent.
- Vodafone would take my firstborn to cover the data charges – or if I’m lucky, just a few pints of blood.
- the new iPhone has a built in GPS chip – so THEY would be able to track my every move, and the black helicopters behind the Orongorongos would be able to sweep in at any moment.
- All the networked iPhones will collectively host an emergent AI – which will beam brain-scrambling rays into the brains of users.
- Making them faceless members of Steve Jobs’ zombie horde – shambling around the streets searching for free wi-fi access points.
- On the plus side – I suppose the zombie hordes will target Redmond first.
- Giving me enough time to train as a ninja – clad in tin foil, to SAVE THE WORLD!
So as you can see, lots of good reasons for not buying an iPhone.
Patrick Quinn-Graham
10 June 2008, 20:09 #
On the flip side, I have a current iPhone that work will have to pay to break out of the contract for when I head back to Vancouver sometime in the next couple of months. This times perfectly with the release of the iPhone 3G there, allowing me to be reamed by Rogers for data charges. Hoorah!
I think.
Now, what was that about training to be a ninja?
Alan
10 June 2008, 20:49 #
Cool! Work-related iPhone! I don’t work for places that do that, but that’s because I work for myself now.
Meanwhile: the coming of the Jobbsian hordes will place a premium on Ninja skillz. Word to the wise.
Mr Reasonable
10 June 2008, 20:50 #
C’mon Alan, you know you want to…..you’d need to sharpen the corners to use it as a shuriken though.
Karl Woodhead
10 June 2008, 21:46 #
I suspect that there may be some prepared to give Vodafone their first born for an IPhone. Not us though! Our firstborn is great! I want one. I’ve got a 3rd gen ipod and am feeling really obsolete. But my iMac is only 9 months old so I’m not completely obsolete. But why didn’t they do a brushed alum iphone like the iMacs?
Alan
10 June 2008, 22:33 #
Mr Reasonable: maybe that is the best use for an iPhone. Ladies and Gentlemen: I present… the Cupertino Shuriken!
Karl: well, once you give up your firstborn you can always pretend that rua was tahi all along – he’ll never know the difference!
Brian
11 June 2008, 09:16 #
I give you no more than 6 months before you’re carrying one around. :-)
Alan
11 June 2008, 09:34 #
Brian: I’d like to take you up on that, as a bet, but being born a Presbyterian I’m still not keen on g*mbling.
Sarah
12 June 2008, 08:26 #
I’m just going to do the old “glue my 2G iPod to my Motorola phone” trick and call it an iPhone. Pretty sure it will be convincing in Naenae.
Alan
12 June 2008, 21:16 #
Maybe someone will steal it and you can get insurance!